Selfie, Shmelfie.

Customer: **clapping hands like a child** ” I love your shop! I want to take a selfie! Can I take a selfie??”
Me: “Knock yourself out.” 
Customer: *Handing me phone* “You take it!”
Me: “You want ME to take a selfie?”
Customer: “Yes!”
Me: **Bemused, but turning phone on myself** “Ok…..”
Customer: “Not you! Not YOU! God! Why would I want a picture of YOU??”
Customer: “Take a selfie of ME!!” *starts posing against flowers*
Me: “Well, by definition, this isn’t a selfie.”
Customer: “It’s a picture of me!”
Me: “I’m taking a photo of you. A selfie is when you take a picture of yourself” (you moron)
Customer: *clapping excitedly* “Take the selfie!!!”
Readers: I took the photo.

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